I’m about to give you some great marriage advice and best of all, it’s free. No, I’m not a marriage counselor or guru, so what qualifies me? Well, I’m married and have been for almost 20 long years. Now, I’m sure there are hundreds, maybe even thousands, of books on the subject of how to save your marriage or how to have a great marriage. I can’t wrap my mind around how one would even have enough words to fill hundreds of pages on this subject.
So, are you ready for the great magical advice?
Are you sure you can handle the awesomeness of what I’m about to tell you?
Ok, then, here it is. Think nice things about your spouse! Yup, that’s it.
Here’s how it works. The majority of relationships fall apart because you let all kinds of things you don’t like about that person add up and all you think about is how he/she is a worthless booboo head who doesn’t do anything right. And you think about it, and think about it, and think about until it’s hard to even be nice to this person that you promised to love, honor and cherish.
Why did you like this person to begin with? What made you fall in love? And don’t be so pig headed that you would sit there and say, “well I never really loved her/him…” That too is wrong thinking. That is just a lie you tell yourself.
I’m telling you it is not always easy, but it can get easier. I wake up everyday and, on purpose, think about something I love about my husband. I even do it if I think he is being a jerk. Why? Because sometimes I’m a jerk too! Nobody is perfect and the next person wouldn’t be either.
To me, the classic “We’ve grown apart and we just aren’t in love anymore” equals I’m thinking about how my life might be better without this person, and I’m forgetting all the good times we’ve shared. It’s your thinking. Think about it!
If you want lasting love, it can be as easy as what you are thinking about. All through the day, think good things about your spouse, even when you’re not feeling like it or you two are in a fight. Can this heal a marriage overnight? Maybe not, but it’s a start and it’s better than the current thinking that is going on if you think that you are fed up with your spouse.
Want to try an experiment? Think about the most awful fight or event that hurt you? How do you feel? Then think about telling the story of how the two of you met or some wonderful time that you shared. How does that make you feel? That should show you how your thoughts can absolutely control your feelings.
If that is all too much, here’s the recap: Think nice things about your spouse! Yup, that’s it.